2002-12-26 - 7:35 a.m.
It’s a lazy day after a lazy holiday stint off of work where I sit and watch DVDs and do nothing for a change. He comes over in a shirt that stinks of the bar. I know he hasn’t been to the bar because it’s Sunday afternoon but he still stinks of nicotine. It’s late in the afternoon and he asks if I have any food. Of course I do. I microwave him some potatoes and turkey. It’s not my best but it will have to do. He leans back into the pillow on the couch and says I am so comfortable on this couch today. He smiles at me and I smile back saying I feel like taking a nap. He’s like don’t do that. After he smokes on my porch he comes back in and starts touching my breasts with his feet. I laugh and ask him “What are you doing?” I smile as he tries to play with me. He takes his stinky shirt off. I take my shirt off and hope he lets me keep the bra. It’s not happening. I keep thinking that I have my fat jeans on and it’s light enough for him to see the fat deposits on my back and thighs. I know I won’t take my jeans off since I am bleeding today. I pull off his jeans and he tries to pull off mine. I refuse but smile pretty and suck his cock. He leans his weight on my sides of my couch as I suck him. He is above me and can see me laid out with my fat spread all around me. I manuaver so that my head ends up resting on his thigh….I keep at it. Somehow he ends up on top again. I take his face in my hands and look into his eyes and say…..”You are trying really hard aren’t you?” to which he replies with the best smile “I’m trying. I want to”. Finally I relax my throat and my neck is screaming with pain and I think he is sort of coming….he said he did but I have my doubts about it. He doesn’t taste like anything. He seems happy enough going back to his car to get ready for his week. Making calls and doing whatever he does on a Sunday night. My son comes home about two hours later. I am still on the couch thinking of his cock in my mouth……thinking about the guys who I have made come this way who had never done that before. They all seem grateful and I don’t even think I suck that well. I feel very happy that he comes over and to do this. I feel close to him. He says my name in such an endearing way…..but I know that I am just delusional about what’s going on here.